it's another gloomy sunday, i have been constantly trying to find something to do for the past 2 weeks. it's really boring without hockey. i could have gone yesterday if not for the wound on my eye, so i just stayed at east coast.
woke up at 10am today.. only had like 6 hours of sleep after watching who am i.. 6 hours of sleep may be sufficient on normal working days but it's the weekend man.. more sleep is expected! i crawled up to go tampines for my hair cut.. came backed, had my shower and rushed to xavier's baby shower. well xavier isn't someone close to me or anything.. well the connection is a little long. in friendster context it should be father-cousin-son-son. the lunch was held at masonic club.. quite privileged to be given a chance to enter the club since it's exclusively by invitational only, even more exclusive than scc. auntie eunice came to greet me.. fuck i was looking for her hot daughter but i think she isn't back from australia. wasted my efforts dressing up for the occasion. nva expected to be able to last 1hr there but i did. i was introduced to 2 other distant cousins.. laine and ben. ben talks alot.. he's working for prudential as an insuarance agent.. ah why didn't i see that coming huh. auntie eunice is one cool auntie man.. she has facebook! how bout that.
i left the place about 230 to bugis. i bought a heinken singlet from bugis st but it was too small so i went to change to L..then went to buy the miniature ferragamo perfume for ht. as i was walking and pacing around bugis.. i just had this feelings.. how nice if i was still with her.. hand in hand shopping for the festive season is one of life's blessings. too bad.. this time round she's going hand in hand with someone else, just hurts to think of it. as i was walking around, i saw recruits with their gf searching for presents.. made me think of the days where we will shop at bugis.. helping me choose a freshbox tee.. and not to forget the couple tee which we bought but never wore. unable to shun those unhappy thoughts away, i left my kaki without even eating. i felt empty. i went for dinner at the airport myself. the airport brought back so much memories.. the good times we had.. the good and bad times i had in ns.
i had the worse tasting ban mian ever.. the soup totally lack flavour. the flashback memories of us dining ipoh hor fun and indian rojak made everything taste so much better. i used to decide on so many things, i ate the food i wanted. i asked, she never complained, i never knew what she really felt. i always thought that whatever i do was healthy for the relationship, i always thought that i made her felt cared for.. but one thing i never realised was how her feelings turned ice cold. i can write an entire storybook about our experiences yet i will never find a convincing answer to why she decided to leave me. i dare say that it isn't because i have no gals.. but somehow i didn't try, somehow my heart cannot accept someone new because no one else fits the bill so perfectly.
i walked to the departure hall. we used to walk to times newslink to browse, cos it's on the way to the interchange and as a way to digest our food. walked a little furthur and there was sakae sushi upstairs.. sakae was our favourite restuarant.. anytime we didn't want something too oily we would head there and we liked this branch for it's service and the workmanship of their sushi. right at the end i saw burger king, the place i had my last supper before heading to brunei, it was the most heart wrenching experience i ever had.. to leave my gf facing this crisis alone.. no matter how much i tell her i love her.. it just cannot replace the heartbreak. as i was walking along the arrival hall.. i thought of the 2 homecomings from my overseas ns stints. we landed at terminal 2 when we returned from taiwan.. i remember weicai and i thought the duffel bags will take forever to come out just like brunei so we took our own sweet time to shop at dfs only realising when we came out we were the only ones left! that scene left a sweet smile on my face, army days are the best time of my life.. the bonds forged is something that cannot be replaced even with your best friend. it's the feeling you know you can trust your life to him and that he will carry you out of danger when you're down.
as i was driving back home.. i thought of how this year's xmas will be without her. for 4 years we spent it together, i guess it's just wishful thinking to hope for more. i don't think she will be even thinking of me this eve, what are cranberries for when the right person is not by your side?
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Tuesday, July 1, 2008
Happy 23rd Birthday to ME
Happy birthday to me! i'm one yr older and officially 23 yrs old now. i left my bloody glasses with faye last night so i needed to wear contact lens to work.. at least look more handsome and tanned lah..haha.. everyone must be thinking why i wear contact lens loh.
just went to work as normal, trying to catch up with the emails on monday and the forecast, thankfully i think my pekarang should be full because of the 3 day delay. i felt like a centre of attraction.. people wishing me happy birthday and all.. the best part was when i went down to smoke.. when i came up i saw linda on my place with pris and shu ee lighting up the candles.. hahah i wanted to make myself scarce since they wanted to surprise me but in the end i just saw them lighting the candles loh. i thought it was a few of them but it ended quite a lot of ppl came over to sing me a birthday song. in previous years it was more like i planned my own birthday but this time it felt memorable, it's like people remember me..not many people remember me. the whole red sea team came over, so did people from australia. i felt happy. at least this yr was better than last year where i spent my birthday recovering from my broken heart.. belle did leave me an advanced birthday msg which i felt wasn't really sincere. but she did talk to me on msn wishing me. i dono why.. we just started talking serious, about stress and all.. then she became uphappy. seriously, it's a good thing we broke up cos i think it will come a point i won't be able to stand her.. she just changed so much.. she took me for granted. probably others won't see her the way i do.. but i can tell cos i seen her change. it's really sad to see the person u once loved change right before ur eyes.
today william is on leave so it was quite slack.. linda also quite slack when he's not around.. sometimes just reading newspapers.. haha. went for lunch with linda, kenny, bj, yk, phyllis at beppu ramen.. this is the first time i had lunch with her loh.. it's quite weird actually..haha. i didn't even want phyllis to turn up but suck thumb loh.. argh jus can't stand her face.. she's so xiao jie kind when she looks so independent.
i left on the dot.. my eyes so tired from looking at the screen with contacts the whole day. went for training.. today's training is good.. we didn't play full pitch but i dominated the play which is what i like, sometimes i do have that kind of form.
i didn't want to be alone on my birthday so i met kimy after training, honestly i felt really touched kimy would wait for me. i was feeling dead tired myself. so i met her at beancurd city at nee soon.. we just chatted and chatted.. most of the time about her complicated love life.. why doesn't anyone ask me about mine? i waited one whole day.. hoping the person who i wish to receive a msg from would msg me but she didn't. did she forget about me? i just felt really upset.. because just last week i asked her out to spend it with me but now she forgot. i'm not so childish to get upset over not being wished. it's really disappointing to have done something for her, talk to her everyday, let her be the one to spend ur bday with yet she doesn't remember you at all. that's my problem. the last msg i received from weicai i sooo wished it was her but it wasn't.. let's just say i gave up hope.
again i sent kimy home.. i was trying so hard to find a bloody petrol kiosk but in the end closed..wth.. came home slept at 2am. did i enjoy my birthday? let's just say.. it can be so much better :)
just went to work as normal, trying to catch up with the emails on monday and the forecast, thankfully i think my pekarang should be full because of the 3 day delay. i felt like a centre of attraction.. people wishing me happy birthday and all.. the best part was when i went down to smoke.. when i came up i saw linda on my place with pris and shu ee lighting up the candles.. hahah i wanted to make myself scarce since they wanted to surprise me but in the end i just saw them lighting the candles loh. i thought it was a few of them but it ended quite a lot of ppl came over to sing me a birthday song. in previous years it was more like i planned my own birthday but this time it felt memorable, it's like people remember me..not many people remember me. the whole red sea team came over, so did people from australia. i felt happy. at least this yr was better than last year where i spent my birthday recovering from my broken heart.. belle did leave me an advanced birthday msg which i felt wasn't really sincere. but she did talk to me on msn wishing me. i dono why.. we just started talking serious, about stress and all.. then she became uphappy. seriously, it's a good thing we broke up cos i think it will come a point i won't be able to stand her.. she just changed so much.. she took me for granted. probably others won't see her the way i do.. but i can tell cos i seen her change. it's really sad to see the person u once loved change right before ur eyes.
today william is on leave so it was quite slack.. linda also quite slack when he's not around.. sometimes just reading newspapers.. haha. went for lunch with linda, kenny, bj, yk, phyllis at beppu ramen.. this is the first time i had lunch with her loh.. it's quite weird actually..haha. i didn't even want phyllis to turn up but suck thumb loh.. argh jus can't stand her face.. she's so xiao jie kind when she looks so independent.
i left on the dot.. my eyes so tired from looking at the screen with contacts the whole day. went for training.. today's training is good.. we didn't play full pitch but i dominated the play which is what i like, sometimes i do have that kind of form.
i didn't want to be alone on my birthday so i met kimy after training, honestly i felt really touched kimy would wait for me. i was feeling dead tired myself. so i met her at beancurd city at nee soon.. we just chatted and chatted.. most of the time about her complicated love life.. why doesn't anyone ask me about mine? i waited one whole day.. hoping the person who i wish to receive a msg from would msg me but she didn't. did she forget about me? i just felt really upset.. because just last week i asked her out to spend it with me but now she forgot. i'm not so childish to get upset over not being wished. it's really disappointing to have done something for her, talk to her everyday, let her be the one to spend ur bday with yet she doesn't remember you at all. that's my problem. the last msg i received from weicai i sooo wished it was her but it wasn't.. let's just say i gave up hope.
again i sent kimy home.. i was trying so hard to find a bloody petrol kiosk but in the end closed..wth.. came home slept at 2am. did i enjoy my birthday? let's just say.. it can be so much better :)
Monday, June 30, 2008
Sentosa
went to sentosa today.. purposely took leave today to plan an outing with faye before she starts work. woke up at 8 today.. i was so so tired.. i came home at 5am after watching the euro finals which spain won! torres goal was excellent, only could come from a liverpool forward man! after sending andi home, i was caught almost dozing off in the car man, just imagine from ntu to changi, it's a super long ride home man.. i was singing to myself to keep myself awake.. i only had 2.5 hrs of slp.. so deprived.
sent mum to work.. i feel so filial man..haha. it feels shiok to tear open a on peak coupon to travel around on a weekday. i met faye at the pawnshop and we had breakfast. i parked my car at sentosa. it feels good driving to sentosa.. it's like hassle free, no need to carry barang barang here and there and needing to wait for the bus, i think i'm too spoiled already..haha. we changed and ran for a run somewhere around 10 plus. this is the first time i ran at sentosa, it feels quite stupid but quite nice.. i mean the scenery is pretty good and you can run as far as u like, when u feel tired just hop on to a tram. all in all we ran around 3km.. not too far just a slow jog to lose some weight. slacked for a while at the car to cool off, it very shady so we just chatted by the boot listening to rihanna. slack lifestyle. we left around 12 pm to change to our beach clothes. went to sakae to have our lunch, i thought it was a normal sakae loh.. in the end it turned out to be teppanyaki and dessert only. but i must say the portion looks small but it was filling.
we headed for underwater world, i think the last time i've been there was like more than 10 yrs ago? we saw a lot of interesting fish, i was getting tired also then also didnt realli feel like taking pics, thank god i had shades with me. we paid $20 and only stayed there for around 30 min loh.. felt it was not really worth it. went for a tan at siloso beach.. i tried to read my book but after that i felt so sleepy i dozed off, most of the time is she wake me up one. we went to cafe del mar for drinks, again i fell aslp for around 1 hr.. and faye took pics on my hp for 1 hr! until my hp left 1 bar only!
after bathing, went to thomson plaza for sushi tei, it was a bloody rip off i feel. i'm not really a person who expects super high standard on my sushi so i won't pay $4 for a kizumi unagi sushi loh. after i sent her home i met kimy at bishan for drinks, didn't stay long cos we were both tired, pretty wasted trip down..haha. but at least i met her lah.. dono why she keeps telling me she not pretty, i think she's pretty, always felt so.. either she met the wrong man or men feel intimidated by her. sent her home to casin's place, brought back memories of me and her.. well it didn't really bring back any old feelings cos it was just a short relationship. everything didn't really look familiar leh.. like never take this road before.. maybe i just didn't really care much about casin loh.
sent mum to work.. i feel so filial man..haha. it feels shiok to tear open a on peak coupon to travel around on a weekday. i met faye at the pawnshop and we had breakfast. i parked my car at sentosa. it feels good driving to sentosa.. it's like hassle free, no need to carry barang barang here and there and needing to wait for the bus, i think i'm too spoiled already..haha. we changed and ran for a run somewhere around 10 plus. this is the first time i ran at sentosa, it feels quite stupid but quite nice.. i mean the scenery is pretty good and you can run as far as u like, when u feel tired just hop on to a tram. all in all we ran around 3km.. not too far just a slow jog to lose some weight. slacked for a while at the car to cool off, it very shady so we just chatted by the boot listening to rihanna. slack lifestyle. we left around 12 pm to change to our beach clothes. went to sakae to have our lunch, i thought it was a normal sakae loh.. in the end it turned out to be teppanyaki and dessert only. but i must say the portion looks small but it was filling.
we headed for underwater world, i think the last time i've been there was like more than 10 yrs ago? we saw a lot of interesting fish, i was getting tired also then also didnt realli feel like taking pics, thank god i had shades with me. we paid $20 and only stayed there for around 30 min loh.. felt it was not really worth it. went for a tan at siloso beach.. i tried to read my book but after that i felt so sleepy i dozed off, most of the time is she wake me up one. we went to cafe del mar for drinks, again i fell aslp for around 1 hr.. and faye took pics on my hp for 1 hr! until my hp left 1 bar only!
after bathing, went to thomson plaza for sushi tei, it was a bloody rip off i feel. i'm not really a person who expects super high standard on my sushi so i won't pay $4 for a kizumi unagi sushi loh. after i sent her home i met kimy at bishan for drinks, didn't stay long cos we were both tired, pretty wasted trip down..haha. but at least i met her lah.. dono why she keeps telling me she not pretty, i think she's pretty, always felt so.. either she met the wrong man or men feel intimidated by her. sent her home to casin's place, brought back memories of me and her.. well it didn't really bring back any old feelings cos it was just a short relationship. everything didn't really look familiar leh.. like never take this road before.. maybe i just didn't really care much about casin loh.
Saturday, June 21, 2008
SCC Sports Fiesta
went down to scc today for sports fiesta. sean called me over the week to ask me if i was interested in helping out.. i said ok.. i mean for a change meet different ppl.. instead of always meeting the same old ppl everytime. and besides, nemo told me she wasn't gonna meet me anyway.. so better to do something to get my mind off things. she said she can't meet me today cos she needed to rebond her hair.. i felt that even if she didn't rebond her hair she wouldn't have chalked up some time for me.. let's face it.. don't think she even thinks about me. all these while i'm just being too optimistic and too unrealistic.
i went to scc at 3.30pm though it starts at 1.. i needed the car so i cant leave home so early.. besides, had a late night with faye as well. i badly needed a tan.. at least 1,2 hrs under the sun better than nothing. i helped out with the hockey game.. they were supposed to juggle the ball with the stick.. it was stupid.. the players are juggling so fast i don't think we are even fast enough to catch how many times they did it lah.. then went to play balut.. it's a pretty fun game if luck is on ur side.. but heck we lost to the ladies team!!
so by 4 plus all the games have ended.. the hot sun also subsided gradually. was just having a beer and smoke with agnes and kevin.. agnes really changed a lot ever since she come back from hk.. she said she slim down but wth.. she still as fat as ever loh. there was this once the mc said "we have a bikini babe.. then blah blah blah.. if u wanna see her get wet pls go over to the dunk basin.." fuck loh.. i find her find there.. dammit agnes in bikini!! *my eyes......arghhhhhhhh...* it was disgusting alright.
went to play some basketball with chandra's son.. he's from st andrews jr.. wow looking at him.. reminded me on how i looked when i was 12.. playing hockey for my sch.. those were the days.. no gf.. no work.. no problems.. that was when ppl ask u what u wanted to do when u grow up and what u wanted to be in 10 yrs time.. and i said.. i wanna be a doctor or a fulltime hockey players. and look at me now.. i realised neither of my dreams..hahaha. well all i can say is things change.. if u set a goal u have to work towards it day in day out no matter what kind of distractions and obstacles are facing you. me and taswinder were squatting and playing bball with "adraino" and a bunch of little girls.. it was pretty fun.. i didn't know i can entertain kids so well. the ndp rehearsals was also on.. then there was this girl who held my finger when she saw the helicopter flew by.. she was scared..hahah so cute man.
as i was sitting at the padang with my mates, watching kids running abt and hearing the band play.. i thought of sherlyn.. i had this sudden urge in me to find out what she is doing.. the urge to get a reply from her. i was contemplating whether to msg her out of the blue on a saturday.. was wondering if she would react negatively. i decided to follow my heart and went ahead with it. though i knew she'll definitely not go on smsing me.. i just replied her whenever she did. when she asked me if i had my dinner.. i don't know why i had a sudden joy in me.. is it cos it's too long someone i wanted ever showed concern to me this way? i just felt that right now everyday i talk to her.. i feel one step furthur away.. the situation seems so different now i have to admit cos she knows that i like her and i know what is it she wants now. she never rejects me nor does she lead me on.. she always leave me half hanging but i'd cling on. another cool evening breeze have sent me wondering if i should call her out next tuesday for dessert after training.. will it be to much to ask for? shall wait till next week and let my heart decide..all i know is i cannot let an opportunity like that slip by me without even trying all the way. pls give me the courage.
i went to scc at 3.30pm though it starts at 1.. i needed the car so i cant leave home so early.. besides, had a late night with faye as well. i badly needed a tan.. at least 1,2 hrs under the sun better than nothing. i helped out with the hockey game.. they were supposed to juggle the ball with the stick.. it was stupid.. the players are juggling so fast i don't think we are even fast enough to catch how many times they did it lah.. then went to play balut.. it's a pretty fun game if luck is on ur side.. but heck we lost to the ladies team!!
so by 4 plus all the games have ended.. the hot sun also subsided gradually. was just having a beer and smoke with agnes and kevin.. agnes really changed a lot ever since she come back from hk.. she said she slim down but wth.. she still as fat as ever loh. there was this once the mc said "we have a bikini babe.. then blah blah blah.. if u wanna see her get wet pls go over to the dunk basin.." fuck loh.. i find her find there.. dammit agnes in bikini!! *my eyes......arghhhhhhhh...* it was disgusting alright.
went to play some basketball with chandra's son.. he's from st andrews jr.. wow looking at him.. reminded me on how i looked when i was 12.. playing hockey for my sch.. those were the days.. no gf.. no work.. no problems.. that was when ppl ask u what u wanted to do when u grow up and what u wanted to be in 10 yrs time.. and i said.. i wanna be a doctor or a fulltime hockey players. and look at me now.. i realised neither of my dreams..hahaha. well all i can say is things change.. if u set a goal u have to work towards it day in day out no matter what kind of distractions and obstacles are facing you. me and taswinder were squatting and playing bball with "adraino" and a bunch of little girls.. it was pretty fun.. i didn't know i can entertain kids so well. the ndp rehearsals was also on.. then there was this girl who held my finger when she saw the helicopter flew by.. she was scared..hahah so cute man.
as i was sitting at the padang with my mates, watching kids running abt and hearing the band play.. i thought of sherlyn.. i had this sudden urge in me to find out what she is doing.. the urge to get a reply from her. i was contemplating whether to msg her out of the blue on a saturday.. was wondering if she would react negatively. i decided to follow my heart and went ahead with it. though i knew she'll definitely not go on smsing me.. i just replied her whenever she did. when she asked me if i had my dinner.. i don't know why i had a sudden joy in me.. is it cos it's too long someone i wanted ever showed concern to me this way? i just felt that right now everyday i talk to her.. i feel one step furthur away.. the situation seems so different now i have to admit cos she knows that i like her and i know what is it she wants now. she never rejects me nor does she lead me on.. she always leave me half hanging but i'd cling on. another cool evening breeze have sent me wondering if i should call her out next tuesday for dessert after training.. will it be to much to ask for? shall wait till next week and let my heart decide..all i know is i cannot let an opportunity like that slip by me without even trying all the way. pls give me the courage.
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Mission Godiva - Success!
it's bloody 1.30am and i'm still not asleep yet despite waking up so early in the morning. guess it's the hockey, i finally let out some steam and sweat like crazy today before the it started to pour like crazy. went down to shaw plaza mac with jon, kok chin, logar.. we just sat there giving precious adv to jon how to break up with dominique.. evil evil. he nva really loved her.. that's a big mistake.. shouldn't even have gone out with her.
today i felt really really happy.. something which i always wanted to do.. to make a godiva ice blended for sherlyn.. i finally did it! i've been dragging since xmas thinking if i should just buy it for her.. in the end i decided to learn it. of cos she didn't know i learnt it for her.. neither does she know i've been wanting to do this for so long.. neither does she know how much braincells and effort i used in my first attempt in blending drinks. after perfecting the recipe, i spent 3 times practicising.. this morning was so rush i didn't have time to really taste it but the proportion was the same then it should be ok. i knew she would love it.. being a dark choc fan.. godiva is the best.. i just wanted to impress her.. if i could melt her heart that's even better (i wonder if i did though) haha. isn't pretty obvious i like her? if any day the sign wasn't obvious.. today it is. another problem is logistics.. how best to blend the drink and deliver it so it won't melt.. and i needed to go early so i don't get caught.. but what if there is ppl in the office alr? in the end it was all smooth.. but i had to drag myself out of bed at 6am..dammit. i left her a note.. at that point.. i realise i completely lost my mind. i never chased a girl.. i never did such a thing to a girl who isn't my gf.. hard to believe but i did. only the cleaner was around.. but the door was locked.. i thought dammit no surprise.. so i walked off thinking just my luck.. BUT i realised the meeting room door was open to i walked back and placed the flask on her table.. i was like "YES AH!!".. hahhaha. i kept looking at my watch thinking when will she come in.. will she even msg me..? will she be put off by my gesture? she msged me saying i was very sweet and she loved the drink.. that's what i wanted to hear.. that she loved it.. i was so proud i did this.. i wonder what she thinks of me.. at least i hope she thinks abt me tonight.. i'm thinking of her every second it's driving me insane..esp when i'm driving.. feel like some drama king..haha. a small step it may be.. it's just the beginning.. and as the saying goes.. u reap what u sow.
today i felt really really happy.. something which i always wanted to do.. to make a godiva ice blended for sherlyn.. i finally did it! i've been dragging since xmas thinking if i should just buy it for her.. in the end i decided to learn it. of cos she didn't know i learnt it for her.. neither does she know i've been wanting to do this for so long.. neither does she know how much braincells and effort i used in my first attempt in blending drinks. after perfecting the recipe, i spent 3 times practicising.. this morning was so rush i didn't have time to really taste it but the proportion was the same then it should be ok. i knew she would love it.. being a dark choc fan.. godiva is the best.. i just wanted to impress her.. if i could melt her heart that's even better (i wonder if i did though) haha. isn't pretty obvious i like her? if any day the sign wasn't obvious.. today it is. another problem is logistics.. how best to blend the drink and deliver it so it won't melt.. and i needed to go early so i don't get caught.. but what if there is ppl in the office alr? in the end it was all smooth.. but i had to drag myself out of bed at 6am..dammit. i left her a note.. at that point.. i realise i completely lost my mind. i never chased a girl.. i never did such a thing to a girl who isn't my gf.. hard to believe but i did. only the cleaner was around.. but the door was locked.. i thought dammit no surprise.. so i walked off thinking just my luck.. BUT i realised the meeting room door was open to i walked back and placed the flask on her table.. i was like "YES AH!!".. hahhaha. i kept looking at my watch thinking when will she come in.. will she even msg me..? will she be put off by my gesture? she msged me saying i was very sweet and she loved the drink.. that's what i wanted to hear.. that she loved it.. i was so proud i did this.. i wonder what she thinks of me.. at least i hope she thinks abt me tonight.. i'm thinking of her every second it's driving me insane..esp when i'm driving.. feel like some drama king..haha. a small step it may be.. it's just the beginning.. and as the saying goes.. u reap what u sow.
Friday, June 6, 2008
going crazy..
i think i need help.. i'm going crazy thinking about sherlyn day in day out.. i just can't get her out of my mind. but how do i justify my actions? though we talk almost everyday on msn.. i only had lunch with her once and i never ever gone out with her, i don't really know her, everything i know about her are through virtual conversations. i can't forgive myself for liking a person through these vague conversations yet i do. can someone help me?!
when she was attached i never dared take a step forward.. just giving an excuse that she was attached and that i would never stand a chance cos she's so faithful to him. now that she's single, i will never ever forgive myself to let this chance slip away. i've never chased a girl, i'm so lost on what to do. i've been single for nearly a year.. been attached for 2.5 yrs before that, never had contatct with any other girl besides belle, now asking me to take a step fwd to date another girl.. man i tell u my nerve is cracking man. you can say i feel intimidated that she's so attractive and confident.. many men will be hot on her heels be it she's attached or not. but that's what life is about isn't it? good things are worth waiting and fighting for. i just need to know if i even stand a glimpse of chance to win her heart, i swear i'll do whatever i can.. just need to get close to her. saying all these doesn't mean a shit if i don't make an effort to. how can i beat my competition? i don't even know what she looks for in a man.. i'm not a very tall guy.. i'm just a lowly ea in pil working ot every single day that i've lost my social life. she's met so many men will she find me boring and "not there"? haha sometimes i feel i'm just being plain stupid thinking about all these keep trying to impress her.. i feel pressured no doubt.. i hope she still does rem our date in 2 weeks time.. instead of telling me about her stm.
faye's coming over to test the godiva ice blended with me.. i hope i master it.. i only have 2 weeks.. i wanna do smtg for her.. smtg to make her feel pampered and that someone thinks of her and makes the effort to do small little stuff to make her happy :) *crosses finger* wooo!
when she was attached i never dared take a step forward.. just giving an excuse that she was attached and that i would never stand a chance cos she's so faithful to him. now that she's single, i will never ever forgive myself to let this chance slip away. i've never chased a girl, i'm so lost on what to do. i've been single for nearly a year.. been attached for 2.5 yrs before that, never had contatct with any other girl besides belle, now asking me to take a step fwd to date another girl.. man i tell u my nerve is cracking man. you can say i feel intimidated that she's so attractive and confident.. many men will be hot on her heels be it she's attached or not. but that's what life is about isn't it? good things are worth waiting and fighting for. i just need to know if i even stand a glimpse of chance to win her heart, i swear i'll do whatever i can.. just need to get close to her. saying all these doesn't mean a shit if i don't make an effort to. how can i beat my competition? i don't even know what she looks for in a man.. i'm not a very tall guy.. i'm just a lowly ea in pil working ot every single day that i've lost my social life. she's met so many men will she find me boring and "not there"? haha sometimes i feel i'm just being plain stupid thinking about all these keep trying to impress her.. i feel pressured no doubt.. i hope she still does rem our date in 2 weeks time.. instead of telling me about her stm.
faye's coming over to test the godiva ice blended with me.. i hope i master it.. i only have 2 weeks.. i wanna do smtg for her.. smtg to make her feel pampered and that someone thinks of her and makes the effort to do small little stuff to make her happy :) *crosses finger* wooo!
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